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| Holiday Blues from Fred's Blog |
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| Holiday Blues
This is usually the most joyous time of the year for most people. But for many single boomers it can be downright depressing!
While many families look forward to gatherings with their relatives, gift shopping and sharing, and festivities of all kinds, I know a lot of boomers who wish that they could leap frog into January without all of this fanfare and commotion.
For so many, particularly those who don't have a significant person in their life, all the holiday celebrations do is to remind them of what they are missing in life.
So, if you are subject to the holiday blues, perhaps this year you need to preplan the holidays so as to soften the effect. Every year at this time I get a shot from my doctor to lessen the chances of getting the flu. Maybe a successful plan will lessen your chances of getting the blues.
So, what should you consider making part of your plan? First of all, most psychologists will tell you that to ward off any feelings of anxiety or depression it helps to be surrounded by others. Spending large amounts of time alone during the holiday season is a sure recipe for disaster. Start making plans to spend quality time with people you care about, and who care about you. Loneliness can't operate in a vacuum that is filled with caring friends and relatives, many of whom will have the same emotions as you.
Whenever I've gotten down in the past, I quickly focused on planning events and trips, things to look forward to. Anticipating happy moments is sure to spark good feelings long before the event. Read our Calendar often. You will see a great many events scheduled during this part of the year, many of them parties that you have a good chance of enjoying.
Maybe one of the things you might want to do is to make plans to be outside of Los Angeles during the holidays. I've spent New Years on cruises, or visiting areas like Seville, Paris, London, Rome, Palm Springs, south Florida, New York, Las Vegas and northern California. Often, being in an entirely different environment will materially affect your disposition and outlook.
This time of year is often a period for people to take stock of the year that has passed, their life goals, successes and failures, their future prospects. Often, we can be very hard on ourselves. Maybe this would be a good time, even if you are not in therapy, to share some time with a therapist, an unbiased party who might help you sort out some of these thoughts and feelings in a meaningful, realistic manner.
Or, maybe you need a few days of private time, whether home, or in a remote, private, tranquil setting, to do some introspection without anyone's influence. Perhaps, this might produce a calming affect.
Sometimes when I've felt sorry for myself during this period I've thought of others far less fortunate. It always helped my perspective. And, if you really want to feel better about your life, do some volunteer work at this time. It's sure to be emotionally rewarding and helpful in keeping you balanced.
New Year's Eve is a biggy! I don't know anyone who wants to be alone during this time. So, if you are not seeing anyone, and the prospects of a date are slim at the moment, don't dwell on what's not happening. Make something happen! It is far better for you to make some worthwhile plans for New Year's Eve now than to wait for Mr/Ms wonderful to show up during the next seven weeks. Trust me, if you are incredibly fortunate to meet someone special during this time there is always the possibility of including this person in the plans you have already created. And, if this is not possible, and this person is truly worthwhile, they will still be there January 1st.
Be positive and stay in control of your life and you will reap many levels of joy and happiness. Feel sorry for yourself and moan and complain to others and you will be welcoming depression and sadness. It's your choice.
More Info: http://lasinglessociety.com/
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